Overheard in the Last Few Months

Sometimes I overhear odd things. I’ve been collecting these on Twitter.

  • “When the squirrel started crying his ears hurt.”

  • “…He looked exactly like me. And in a few days he was picked up by a private jet…”

  • First guy: “You’re like Superman flying backwards around the world.”

    Second guy: “You’re like…”

    First guy: “Shotgun!”

  • A mother to a whiny toddler: “You’re not being very rainbowy.”

  • In a bookstore, an older woman: “I’m looking for Farland.”

    A younger woman, maybe her daughter: “Oh, you have to go by name?”

  • In the same bookstore, someone’s opinion of Neil Gaiman: “He’s a new writer… I’m not sure I like his style. It’s very harsh and now.”

  • In a different bookstore: “It’s not just a monkey book, it’s also about conservation.”

  • Husband (enthusiastically): “Do you like fried okra?”

    Wife (sternly): “No, I do not.”

    Husband (plaintively): “Why?”

  • Kid: You wanna buy coffee table books?

    Other Kid: Let’s do it!

    Younger Kid (confused): Coffee table?