Category Archives: Speculative Fiction

Science fiction and/or fantasy.

Doctor Who Reviews: The Slow Empire

It’s been a while since I’ve posted much on this blog. I should do something about that. To get things going, here’s a review of a Doctor Who novel which originally appeared in the second issue of Shooty Dog Thing, a fanzine edited by Paul Castle.

Of course, if you’re not a fan this won’t be of any interest. Feel free to skip it.

If you are a fan, let me recommend The Slow Empire by Dave Stone.

You may have come across The Slow Empire. If so, its profound ugliness probably discouraged you from picking it up. When I say The Slow Empire is ugly I don’t mean it’s unpleasant or somehow immoral. I’m saying it’s physically ugly, as an object. BBC Books’ chronically maladroit designers managed to top themselves with this one. On the cover, a dull arrangement of planets and electrical arcs in the colors of unpleasant bodily fluids haloes the head of a half-blurry, bile-filtered stock photo of Paul McGann. Inside, whole sections of text are laid out in Comic Sans MS, the font that turns everything it touches into an amateur garage-sale flyer. This thing looks like it was vanity-published by a high school dropout.

In short, The Slow Empire needs a little love… the more so because Dave Stone is an acquired taste. Honestly, he’s kind of weird. But it’s a grounded weirdness. Stone has a deep grasp of human nature; characters react to freakish and strange plot twists in ways that seem just somehow right. There’s an aura of conviction here that many Who writers can’t manage. He’s also digressive, tossing ideas around like cheap salad, following wherever they lead. His books are as much about his digressions as about plot, and The Slow Empire has less plot than most. It’s there, but it’s not the point so much as an excuse to have a novel.

Continue reading Doctor Who Reviews: The Slow Empire

A Couple of Links

I’ve been fighting exhaustion all winter. You might get some idea of how tired I’ve been, and why, when I say that where I live we’ve had forty inches of snow since December.

While I’m trying to come up with a real post, here are a couple more links:

1. How would you feel if you were a new SF writer, and on the back of your brand-spanking-new first novel you found this?

(Via.)

2. Jeff VanderMeer is soliciting his readers’ weird stories on his blog.

New Adventures Reviews: Deceit (Part One)

(This is the first half of a half-finished review. I’m hoping going ahead and posting it will prod me into writing the rest.)

The word for Deceit is “functional.” It does not tell an exciting story. It does not explore characters in great detail. It doesn’t say much about the human condition. Deceit was conceived and written solely to advance the editorial goals of Peter Darvill-Evans, New Adventures mastermind.

He’s testing his own editorial guidelines. He’s reintroducing Ace. He’s filling in the New Adventures’ future history. He’s cleaning up and retconning the last few books’ worth of characterization oddities. And he’s explaining his theory of time travel. As Darvill-Evans says in his afterward/apologia, “That’s a lot of functions for one medium-length novel to perform. I hope you didn’t notice it creaking under the weight of so many burdens.”

Deceit creaks. Understandably. Any writer juggling five such unwieldy objects hasn’t got a lot of spare attention for the things that make a book, y’know, good. The surprise is that Deceit is adequate. Continue reading New Adventures Reviews: Deceit (Part One)

New Adventures Reviews: The Pit

I just read The Pit. It’s staring into me, man. It’s staring riiiiiiight into me.

The Pit. My god. No title has ever described its book with such pure and concise accuracy. Not even the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders. This book is a legend among Doctor Who fans. Fifteen years later the mere mention of the name Neil Penswick brings fainting fits. Some people swear their copies of The Pit have tried to kill them.

Can The Pit really be that bad? Yes, it can. Is it the worst of the New Adventures series? Yes, it is. Is it really, as has been an article of faith for so long, the Worst Doctor Who Book Ever?

Well, no. But only because so many boring runarounds were published by BBC Books. The Pit is at least interestingly bad.

Continue reading New Adventures Reviews: The Pit

New Adventures Reviews: The Highest Science

(Another Doctor Who book. Continue bearing with me.)

I’m just getting back to rereading the New Adventures, and I find I don’t have much to say about The Highest Science—in fact, I couldn’t even summon up the enthusiasm to read it properly, though I skimmed bits of it. I don’t know why. There’s nothing wrong with it, and I have nothing against Gareth Roberts in general. It just didn’t grab me. (I’m actually more interested in rereading The Pit, just to see if it’s as bad as I recall.) So this is a much shorter and less careful review than some of my others.

Continue reading New Adventures Reviews: The Highest Science

Short Trips to Bland Places

Fair warning: I’m about to post a couple things that will be of no interest unless you follow Doctor Who. Bear with me.

There’s a small company called Big Finish that has a license to publish Doctor Who audio dramas and short story collections. The latter are published under the series name Short Trips.

Not long ago I discovered a couple of recent “Short Trips” volumes going for ten dollars each on Amazon. I haven’t been following the range, because they’re a bit pricey. Ten dollars is a bit less pricey. So I thought what the hell, and ordered Short Trips: Farewells and Short Trips: The Centenarian.

I am glad I did not pay twenty-five dollars each for these books.

Continue reading Short Trips to Bland Places

Not Really a Review of Spin Control

Sometimes I think I should update this more… so I’m going to try to review some of what I’ve been reading lately. Obviously I’ll have to try harder in future as in this case I did not end up with a review.

For some reason I’ve been reading a lot of Hardass Space Mercenary books. First there was Richard Morgan’s Broken Angels. Then Spin Control. Now I’m reading Morgan’s Woken Furies and pretty soon I’m going to reread the Doctor Who: New Adventures novel Deceit, in which Ace returned to the series. As a hardass space mercenary. I have no idea why I am doing this.

The main thing I learned from Spin Control is that series books really, really need to include plot summaries of previous books. Really. I read the preceding book (Spin State) a couple of years ago. At this point I remember nothing except that (A) I mildly enjoyed it, even though (B) it was fifty to a hundred pages over its natural length. Spin Control’s plot is independent of the earlier book, but kept referencing people and places and bits of future tech that I felt I should have recognized, but didn’t.

Beyond that… well, this one is fifty to a hundred pages too long again, but I get that feeling from a lot of science fiction these days. Meanwhile, fantasy is getting shorter. Charles Stross has had to chop his Merchant Princes books in half, and I get the impression that Paul Park’s Roumania tetralogy was originally supposed to be a trilogy. (Just the way the natural stopping point for the first volume occurs about a third of the way into the second. You know. Little things.)

This is why I could never work in publishing: the forces that shape the industry are as mysterious to me as quantum mechanics.

Transit

Ah, yes, Transit. The book that caused the Great Fan Freakout of 1992.

When this thing was published a great pained howling arose from the fans, or at least from a few of the louder ones. You’d have thought that Ben Aaronovich had personally broken into their homes and relieved himself on their Target novels. Gary Russell wrote a mildly hysterical review in Doctor Who Magazine1 calling it, in addition to “convuluted [sic] and self-referential,” “the most purile, non-Doctor Who book it has ever been my misfortune to read.” And the letters pages were flat-out crazy. I’m embarassed to admit this, but at the time DWM actually dissuaded me from buying Transit. My book budget was limited as a teenager, and the magazine was my only contact with the collected wisdom [sic] of fandom, and I skipped several early NAs when the buzz wasn’t good. Not until I got on the internet and read the opinions of sane people did I go back to it.

I couldn’t figure out what everyone was so upset about. Continue reading Transit